If Your Dog Could Text...

Let's say your beloved mutt managed to grow some thumbs and was able to use a cellphone—it would probably be a very bad thing because you'd end up getting texts like this ALL THE FRIKKIN TIME.

You will NEVER regret spending a day marveling at God's wonderful creations, the cool water on your body, the soft sand beneath your feet AND the overload of beautiful beach babe butt in your face - DAYUM!

Forget 'when animals attack!', the new trend in the critter community is to prove that humans are not the only species capable of interrupting a snapshot. Enter the masters of photo-disaster, the photobombing animals!

With the exception of the 'EPIC' school, these are NOT the educational facilities that you would want your kids sent to. It would almost amount to child cruelty if they attended any of these!

I've seen some oversize animals before but some of these are total nightmare fuel. A cricket that's big enough to chomp a whole carrot? A crab the size of a dustbin? Oh god. I think I just pooped a little.

Pets are good at certain things, like licking their crotches, shedding on your clothes and getting under your feet before you manage to reach the lightswitch, but ask then to fix your car and they're utterly useless.

Partying is fine but unless you're partying hard there's really no point. It's like they always say: If you're not absolutely bombed then you might as well not exist. Everyone here knows that & follows that mantra to the letter.

Something that's happened to all red blooded males with a pulse & GOD FORBID there might be someone around with a camera to record the event when it does! It's one gallery you can browse without questioning your sexuality.

What do you get if you cross video games and table top gaming? A kickass army from a demonic dimension, complete with Former Humans, Cacodemons, Lost Souls, Revenants and even a fat greasy Mancubus. Sterling work.

America's favourite couch-potato pastime comes bundled in with the other best distractions known to man. How and why football is related to women taking the gaze of every red blooded man away from the game is beyond me.

It's weird to think that in the age of iTunes & MP3 playes that some of the younger generation will have no idea what an LP ablum cover looks like, for the rest of us it was an age of fun and really getting into the music.